a slight apology
My wrist hurt :((((((( But that’s not important what is important is that I have to fix some slight issues with the last Blog post people saw on gamejolt because maybe in my excitement i did not properly explain and I will explain it now by answering some questions
- is this a skit/ARG/art project
Nope I really have unlisted and removed the downloads for all of the scum trash I made, and it’s kind of saddening people think I am a dude who would do that, actually that reminds me of a similar situation that happened in an old friend group that was meant to investigate ARGS where one guy pretended as if, well I can’t remember all the details but something along the lines of him being kidnapped or something and this caused the group to of course get panicked and try to help the guy out by trying to notify police and shit but he was actually doing it for an ARG project he was planning which is really fucking stupid. And I make sure I won’t do the same shit that guy did because sure I like blurred lines but I try to make it obvious like with the Monde Canin Posts. But TLDR No this isn’t some ARG or something I really have delisted the scum trash - Are you suicidal
I Believe most people ask this because of the line I said where I talked about how the ending of Monde Canin was going to have an announcement where I was going to say that on the 1st of November I was going to live stream my suicide. No I am not suicidal I just am an artist. See I believed and still do that this is a perfect ending to the franchise, just like how Bob Flanagan had his last moments be saved in a documentary so would I in a different art medium. Now I’m still not suicidal I am not depressed or any of that I just wanted to do it because that’s a good ending to the entire trash franchise, I think it would have been pretty good but I have scrapped that idea because I decided to unlist all of the trash. So no sorry guys it’s not going to happen I won’t commit suicide on live stream. Maybe what I’m saying is wrong but fuck I’m going to figure that out in like maybe a couple of months. - Are the scum fucks going to be relisted
No. They do not deserve to be public they are the filth of the world and I do not want to see them ever again. - what was up with that edit
I just wanted people to understand that the „games" suck. I wasn’t sad because "waaahhhh someone called the game bad" I was sad people were lying to me by not acting as if it was bad when they were they were bad trash. They don’t have the silver lining happy appy has where even if it’s bad you can still tell the creator really loved the art of creepypasta and wanted to try and be just like the their idols. These "games" were soulless. Anyways no one noticed it in the comments but the video of the cabin people are entering Ted kazinsky‘s cabin. Also the footage just looks cool. But yeah I just was dissapointed that people didn’t like that I delisted the games.
writing all of this I realize that maybe what I am all saying is just bullshit that maybe what I have done is horrible, but something in me doesn’t want me to realize that. Something that makes me want to say sorry but I just can’t, I’m too stubborn for that.
I haven’t felt well these past months. My wrists pains have been growing, I still haven’t got my drivers license and
There’s something else that has been happening in my personal life, I don’t know how to quite say it but it’s just that a family member of mine has cancer. I think that maybe explains my erratic behavior but probably not. I wish I could do the things people want me to do but I’m afraid, I don’t want to lose the people I actually like and yet I do, I always do. Somedays I just sit and wonder what god has planned for me, if he really wants me to prosper why give me all horrible things. Why can’t I make games, why do people I love die, why does no one understand what I understand? Why are we all so different. That’s maybe me being cringe but that’s just what I’ve been thinking about. I should have probably never unlisted the "games" even if they were harmful to my own view of myself maybe keeping them up was good. I don’t know I’m rambling once more but, I just want people to know I’m fine, I‘m sorry and the trash won’t come back I think.